Wednesday, October 3, 2012

The Tortoise vs. Despair

When I wrote that last post, I may have been feeling a bit on the neurotic side.

Don't judge me.

Taking a trip to (or becoming the mayor of?) the dark side of Emotionallyunstableville helped me to come to some very healthy realizations:

1.  I've been working out too hard for too long for too disappointing results
2. Rome was not built in a day.  Getting discouraged and giving up after one week is immature and self-defeating.  I know, duh.
3.  I'm not doing this for a number on the scale.  I'm doing it for overall health and fitness and quality of life.
4.  Diet is the end all beat all.  "Lose weight in the kitchen, get fit in the gym."

 I've had a few "Come to Jesus" moments over the last few weeks.  I'm starting to get it. What I've figured out is that I have been using exercise as a way to punish my body for being "bad."
As in ...
  • Eat the Taco Bell, do a gazillion push-ups until your right arm screams "UNCLE" in the form of wicked tendonitis.  
  • Scarf down that jamoca milkshake, run on the treadmill 'til your injured foot is begging you for mercy. 
  • Overindulge on homemade bread, do squats until your hip goes from a happy 40 years old to an angry, bitter 90-years-old-and-in-a-nursing-home.  
Ate that burrito, did ya?  Take THAT!

I was trying to outrun my bouts of bad eating with my 6-days-per-week-4:30-in-the-morning exercise routine.  WRONG.

But then, when I'd have a good week or so of eating really well and that blasted scale wouldn't say what I wanted--no, desperately NEEDED--it to say, I'd cry, call it very bad names using words that no good Mormon girl should ever utter, then head to the drive-thru to show it a thing or two about who's boss.

Who's the boss, you ask?  That'd be discouragement.  It's been bossing me around a lot lately.  Well, that and the scale.  The scale has been sucking my mojo for years now.  I guess that means the scale sucks.  Yeah boy it does.

Now, having joined this Biggest Loser competition, the scale will and must be a factor to consider.  So far, I'm down six pounds from the initial weigh-in a few weeks ago.  I'll take that.  It's better than a purple nurple or a stick in the eye--or both--at the same time.  Weighing in at the gym once per week keeps me accountable.  I need that.  It's a good thing.

What I do NOT need is to continue to beat myself up (mentally AND physically) day after day, week after week and to keep giving up and starting over again and again.  I have been working out really hard for a long time.  Lots of weights, lots of cardio, lots of hurt, lots of pounds gained (what?), and recently, lots of injuries that are causing me lots of grief.  I'm no math genius, but that equation seems a little off to me.

The plan now is to take care of my body rather than punishing it.  To give it what it needs to be healthy, like good food and beneficial exercise.  To have BALANCE.  Over the past few weeks, I have been focusing on eating REAL food.  I bought a juicer.  I've been replacing meals here and there with freshly juiced veggies and fruit.  I have been incorporating more "rest" days into my workout routine every week.  Sunday is my day off.  Three days per week I go hard with lots of weights and cardio.  The other three days, I do 20 minutes on the tread, but nothing brutal.  Just moving the bod.

Doing this, the weight loss is and will be slow, but I am learning to be good with that.  Impatience and wanting change RIGHT NOW have not served me well. That mindset has created frustration and the desire to repeatedly give up.  Taking things more slowly, I am keeping my sanity and I haven't said a single swear word, at least at the scale, for a good week or more.


Having let go of my obsession with the scale and with punishing myself, my attitude is much better.  I feel better about what I'm doing and where I'm headed.  And I'm OK with the tortoise-like pace at which I'm doing it.  I don't need to lose 10 pounds by next Thursday.  I don't need to run a 5k next week or even next month.  It'd be nice, but it's not my reality.  I'm going in the right direction and so is the scale, slowly but surely.

Now THAT's progress.

What has been YOUR a-ha moment?  What have you changed in your routine mentally and/or physically that has helped you have the best results?

Monday, September 3, 2012

Losing at The Biggest Loser

Hi.  Remember me?   That girl who was gonna kick fat's butt and leave it crying like a girl in a wrung out heap on the gym floor?

Funny how even the grandest and worthiest of intentions can get flung to the wayside.  But then again, when it comes to getting healthy and losing weight, this is the story of my life.  Get sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, feel motivated and determined to make big changes, tell the world "This is IT!," go hard core for a week or two, see no results because my body fights me at every turn, get mad and discouraged and frustrated and throw my chubby hands up in the air and eat an entire pizza.  Lather, rinse, repeat.

Warning:  If you don't find whining and sniveling attractive, today's blog post may not be up your alley.  Consider yourself warned.

Resume whining and sniveling in 3, 2, 1 ...

My most recent onset of the "This is it!" disorder struck me a few weeks ago when I heard of a local gym that was sponsoring a Biggest Loser competition, complete with a trainer, a team, team workouts, team challenges, weigh-ins, and full access to the gym for the full 12 weeks of the competition.  The most appealing aspect of this competition to me?  ACCOUNTABILITY.  Knowing that I have a team counting on me and that my numbers will be posted for everyone to see are key.  WAY key.  So, I handed over the $250 last Monday night, stepped on the scale (GAH!), and began a week of hard workouts and perfect eating.   Knowing how hard and how often I'd worked out this week and how many times I'd watched my family eat the "good" food while I ate the spinach greens and chicken breast or egg whites, I was SOOOO excited to get on that scale this morning for that second weigh-in, the one that was going to blow them away because it was so awesomely awesome.  I braced myself for the look of shock on the skinny gym receptionist chick's face when she saw how much weight I'd lost.  I was ready to feel that sense of accomplishment and victory, not to mention putting everyone else to shame with my jaw-dropping results.

And the results:   0.  ZERO pounds lost.  Not even one or two.  Just zero.  Followed by me grabbing my complimentary Biggest Loser gym bag and my shoes and rushing out to my car before anyone could see me burst into tears.



Why?  Why am I doing this?  Why am I writing down every last morsel that I eat, obsessing over every bite of food that goes into my mouth, balancing proteins and good carbs and fruits and veggies and fats, staying away from chips and crackers and cookies and white flour, working out until my face is purple and I'm drowning in my own sweat, only to have my heart shattered into a million tiny pieces by an inanimate object that shows me numbers that don't even BEGIN to match up to the amount of work and consistency I have put in over the last seven days?   HOW in the world does a person stay motivated to keep at it, to never give up, when the results don't come?  Those first weeks are supposed to be the weeks when the weight falls off at the highest rate.  If week one looks like this for me, where do I go from here?  It only gets harder with the results coming less easily.  I've watched enough episodes of the real Biggest Loser to know that.

This has been my world for the past few years.  So much frustration.  So much work.  So much disappointment and giving up and starting over.  And now, just when I thought all this disappointment and frustration couldn't be any more fun, I have teammates whom I get to let down as well.

Help?  Anyone?  Fat is kicking my butt and leaving me crying like a girl in a wrung out heap on the floor.


Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Thinking for myself

Yesterday's blog post taught me something.

This diet and exercise thing is a touchy subject.  It's like politics and religion and Michael Jackson--best left alone if you're not prepared to handle the emotional responses that are inevitably evoked.

It's OK.  I'm prepared.

Yesterday, I used words like "hogwash" and "bunk" and "nonsense" when referring to the grossly misunderstood and over-exaggerated notion of starvation mode.  I got some feedback from some people who felt I was attacking their chosen way of eating.


To those people, I say first that I'm sorry.  Sort of.  Sorry that I presented it in such a way that it came across as an attack on your way of life.  Secondly I say, please read it again if you still feel that way.  I dissed an idea, not a practice.  I dissed the weight loss community for insisting for so long that we are putting our bodies into starvation mode (bunk) if we don't eat every few hours, making many of us feel that the ONLY way to succeed at weight loss is to eat tiny amounts of food throughout the day and never enjoy a guilt-free meal again.  This is really misleading and completely overblown and it makes me mad.


THAT is the idea at which I am thumbing my nose.  




I have some great links that cite solid research which shows what it takes for our bodies to go into TRUE starvation mode, and I was going to post them, but I learned something else yesterday:  It doesn't matter what I post.  It doesn't matter if I get Richard Simmons and Jillian Michaels and that Tony Little guy with the awesome ponytail to shout it from the rooftops.  People know what works for them and they're going to take it personally if someone comes along and says "Hey, you might have been misled about the science behind what you're doing."   


I'm no different. 


My "diet" is the right one. 
My religion is the right one.
My presidential candidate is the right one.
And Michael Jackson was a pedophile.

So there.

This weight loss thing is a huge learning process for me.  This blog is a way for me to share what I'm doing and what I'm learning.  What's working and what's not. When I share some of my "a-ha!" discoveries, it's absolutely up to you to decide whether or not you give a crap.  It's up to you to decide if you want to lend it credibility and read more or just blow it off as one more piece of information you have to sift through or one more thing that Jacey's going to try and fail at.  I can live with either.  Just understand that much of what I write is for entertainment purposes and because I think I'm mildly amusing, not because I believe myself to be a foremost expert on losing weight.


I understand that the only way I will ever have a toned leg to stand on is to have measurable success and to finally be able to say, "HEY, EVERYBODY!  LOOK AT ME! THIS WORKS!"   Only then will anyone truly listen to what I have to say, and it's only then that anyone SHOULD listen to me.  After all, who am I?  Someone who's been trying and failing at weight loss for a lifetime?  Umm, yep.  That's me.  I've had a couple of big successes with it in the past, but here I am again.

I will repeat once more for the record that I believe that anything you do where you are restricting your calories will bring weight loss results.

Cutting out bread
Cutting out sugar
The grapefruit diet
The hot dog diet
The Ding Dong diet
The swallow-a-tapeworm-on-purpose diet

They might suck, nutritionally speaking, but they all create a calorie deficit (or massive amounts of diarrhea), so they all work for losing weight.

Of course there are things we can eat that are better for us and more beneficial to our bodies, but when it comes to losing fat, cutting calories will do the trick, no matter how you do that.

Two of my all-time favorite weight loss blogs are written by people who lost weight counting calories, plain and simple.  344 pounds is written by my virtual buddy Tyler W. who has made quite the name for himself in the weight loss world.  He's lost around 135 pounds eating food that wouldn't likely be considered healthy, just eating less of it.  The other fave, Can You Stay For Dinner?, is written by an amazing young woman who has also lost 135 pounds.  She is a food writer/critic/author.  Food is literally her life.  She loves a good meal and eats three meals per day.  Neither of these people is an advocate of the fasting lifestyle, to my knowledge, but that doesn't mean I don't have enormous amounts of respect for them and their successes.   They've done what works for them.  That makes it their "right thing."

I'm searching for my "right thing" and sharing what I'm learning along the way.

I'm straightforward. Some people don't like that.  OK. If you want to print out and shred my blog posts and let your pet bunny poop on them, I say go for it.  But when I say I've read studies that tell my common sense side that certain claims are hogwash, give me some credit for having half a brain and understand that I'm sharing information, not reading some anorexic goth teenager's blog and trying to pass it off as gospel.  And then go Googling stuff for yourself if you don't want to take my word for it.  But for Pete's sake, please don't argue with me about it if you're not willing to do what I've done, which is to explore ALL of the options and learn about them.

We all know what works.  We just don't all understand WHY our "right thing" works because there is so much conflicting "knowledge" out there. Everyone is an expert.  I try to take in as much credible information as I can and then think for myself using that information and my own common sense (I believe God gave us reasoning abilities and brains for a reason). And then I write about it and give my non-sugar-coated assessment and let you do with it what you will. 


In the meantime, I really love this post from fellow IF'er Jenna about fielding others' opinions on fasting vs. eating more frequently.  http://19hours-freedom.blogspot.ca/2010/04/achilles-heel-of-fasting.html

Now, time for some Billie Jean on Pandora ...

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Life in the "fast" lane

When you hear the word "fasting," what comes to mind?   Deprivation?  Despair?  Trying to eat your young because you're so hungry that every time you look at them you see little cheeseburgers with arms?

I'm right there with you.   Or I WAS.

Before I go on, I want to issue a disclaimer:  What I am about to write is not directed at anyone in particular.  I've been fighting this weight loss battle for a looong time, and one thing I have heard ad nauseum is, "You're probably not eating enough," or, "You need to eat more often."  Everyone says this to me, and I stopped finding it annoying a long time ago.  I promise.  I just smile and nod and realize that people really are trying to be helpful by sharing what has either worked for them, or what they themselves have been told repeatedly by those supposedly in the know.

I know that many people have been successful with the plan that suggests eating several very small snack-ish type meals every day, and every couple of hours, rather than the traditional three meals per day.  If that works for them, then great.  But me, I like MEALS.  You know ... a big, fat chicken breast with a big side of carbs and another big side of vegetables followed by something sweet (thanks again, dad, for the the inherited after-dinner sweet tooth).  Eating like a bird all day long leaves me feeling like ... a  really hungry and dissatisfied bird.   A cranky one at that.

I WILL peck your eyes out.


In the end, it all comes down to burning more than you take in.  Go ahead, eat those six Twinkies.  If that's all you eat today, you'll lose weight.  You'll be sick and unhealthy, but you'll lose weight.  The point here is that no matter where/when/how you take in your energy, using more than you ingest will bring weight loss results.  

For someone whose problem is an obsession with food, having to eat every couple of hours and therefore spend a LOT of time preparing things to eat can be problematic. It feeds that obsession.  If someone came to me and told me they had a drinking problem, I'd likely NOT tell them to go get a job as a bartender.  Same concept here.

Now, enter the concept of fasting.


What I'm talking about here isn't the nonsense you typically hear about where you ("you," meaning "annoyingly skinny celebrities") go 30, 60, even 90 days taking in nothing but fruit/veggie juice.  No thank you.

I'm talking about intermittent fasting, herein referred to as "IF."   There are different ways to do this:

-Fast (nothing to eat and nothing but calorie free beverage) for a 24 hour period a couple of times per week.
-Fast daily for anywhere from 16-20 hours, allowing yourself an eating "window" of 4-8 hours every day.

I've chosen to do the latter (started at 16 hours and now doing about 18-19 daily), and so far I am very happy with it.   

My observations

The Pros:

-Less obsessing. I am no longer spending endless hours in the morning preparing all my little snacks to take with me to work.  This sets me free in so many ways.  It's hard to explain if you've never had a dysfunctional relationship with food, but not having to deal with food for the better part of my day just creates a feeling of freedom for me.  I feel my obsession with food diminishing and I like it.

-A sense of control.  When I overeat, the first thing I feel after binging is a sense of guilt over my complete lack of control--and it is one ugly, vicious cycle.  On the flip side, when I refrain from eating for a long period of time and let my mind rule rather than my stomach, I feel empowered.  I feel as though I'm gaining control over an area of my life that has long controlled ME.  This does wonders for my psyche.

-A "lighter" feeling.  With a 5-hour eating window (the IF crowd refers to this as a feeding window, but I feel like I should be eating from a trough when I use that term) every day,  the opportunity to overeat is greatly decreased.  Sure, I could spend five hours stuffing my face, but I don't.  My face-stuffing days ended a long time ago.  I eat too much, to be sure, but typically over the course of an entire day (a few Doritos here, a Zinger or two there, grazing during the dinner-cooking hour until I've inadvertently consumed the equivalent of two meals), not in a few short hours.  

-I'm not dying.  I have times where I feel hungry, but it usually passes with a big drink of water.  And I've even noticed that, when it's time to break my fast and I've gone 17 or more hours without food, I don't feel ravenously hungry.  Yes, I'm ready to eat something, but there are no cheeseburgers with arms anywhere in sight.  

-Weight loss.  I'm still new at this IF thing.  I'm still trying to find a groove and be 100% consistent with it.  But I've found that when I do it and do it right for a couple of days in a row, I see the scale go down and I just plain feel better--more energy and never weighed down by an overstuffed gut.

The Cons (there really aren't many):

-The family factor.  One thing I read in my many studies on this subject is that this IF thing is much harder to do if you are not a single, carefree sorta person.  I have kids.  Kids like to eat.  I hear it's good for kids to eat dinner pretty much every day.  This means I am cooking for them at night during part of my fasting period.  It's a challenge, but I find that if I break my fast (at 4:00) with something relatively healthy and filling (a piece of whole wheat toast and a green smoothie), I'm not terribly tempted to help myself to giant spatulas full of their dinner.

-Adjusting.  This takes some getting used to.  It's different.  It bucks against what you've always done because you've always been told to do it.  There is an adjustment period, and though I like this way of eating and I think it's going to work well for me, I'm still in that adjustment phase.

For the skeptics

Not convinced?  Or on the fence?  Google it.  That's what I did.  I was very surprised at how much information I found on this subject and at how many former advocates of the eat-every-two-hours diet have been converted to the IF lifestyle.  There is a TON of science out there backing this way of eating.

If you don't feel like Googling it, let me just share with you some of the things I've learned:

-"Starvation mode" is bunk.  Hogwash.  Nonsense.  We humans, especially Americans, are spoiled.  We think we're starving if we miss our afternoon snack.  How did our ancestors (you know, the ones who weren't so fat?) live?  Do you think they stopped at the 7-11 and grabbed a granola bar every time they felt a twinge of hunger?  They ate what they grew or killed and eating wasn't always an hourly or even daily occurrence.  Studies show that metabolism will slow after long periods of fasting, but the percentage is so minute and insignificant that it barely registers on the charts.  If our bodies truly are starving, guess where they  go for fuel?  Our FAT STORES!  If  your body stops burning fat when you eat less, can someone please explain anorexics to me?  How do they get down to -12% body fat and 75 pounds if their bodies stopped burning fat when they stopped eating?

Note:  In no way do I condone or advocate dabbling in anorexia.  Bad idea.

This is an instance where people (mainly fitness professionals/personal trainers) have said something so often and for so long, that it's become fact without really being 100% factual.  While there's nothing unhealthy about eating 5-6 small, nutritious snacks per day, it's not keeping your body from the dreaded and imaginary "starvation mode," as has been pounded into us.

Big, fat, HUGE clarification here:  I am not saying that you are an idiot for using frequent eating to lose weight.  Nor am I saying that the method itself is hogwash or bunk.  You can stop writing that angry comment you were about to send me.  I'm saying that there is a whole lot of misunderstanding out there about WHY it works.  It works because calories are being restricted.  Calorie restriction coupled with frequent eating works. I do not dispute that.  I only dispute the reasons we've been given about WHY it works.   If you were eating 600 calories 6 times per day, you can't tell me that you'd expect to lose weight or rely on a raised metabolism to burn fat for you.  This article explains it oodles better than I can:  http://www.bengreenfieldfitness.com/2011/10/snacking-metabolism/

-Weight loss/muscle gain.  Our bodies are primed for fat-burning while in fasting mode as practiced with IF.  Again, Google this.  I read so many articles and visited so many sites that I didn't keep track of many of the links.  Studies have shown that fasting with proper nutrition and proper weight-lifting technique actually IMPROVES the body's ability to gain muscle, and we all know that more muscle = more calories burned.  That IS a fact.

-Overall health.  One thing I read over and over again in my quest for info on IF was that fasting has been shown to cause marked health improvements (improved cholesterol numbers, for one) and is linked to prevention of pesky little maladies like cancer, type II diabetes, and dementia, just to name a few.  Read up on it.  You'll be impressed.

-No more grazing.  I chose my eating window as 11am to 4pm because 4:00 (the time I usually get home from work) is when I typically start undoing all the good things I've done all day long, and the undoing continues until about 9:00 at night.  I get home and the house is a mess and the kids are loud and there's a laundry list (actual laundry included) of things for me to do before bedtime.

Let the stress eating begin.

"Oh, it won't hurt anything if I just have this handful of Fritos."
"It's just a few bites of chicken enchilada casserole that I swore I wasn't going to touch."
"Oh, it won't hurt anything if I just have this handful of Fritos."
"I really need/deserve to eat this chocolate bunny leftover from Easter 2010."
"Oh, it won't hurt anything if I just have this handful of Fritos."

When it comes to "snacks," if I give myself an inch, I take a mile.  On the other hand, when I know I'm in fasting mode and NOTHING is allowed, I have no leeway.  And once again, I have that sense of control that empowers me.

In a nutshell

Despite all of the suggestions out there to the contrary, our bodies indeed were NOT made to be fed every few hours.  We are not garbage disposals.  Our bodies were designed to be fed what we NEED to survive, and not to be constantly fed just to avoid slight little feelings of discomfort now and then.  When you feel those little pangs of hunger, embrace them.  Encourage them.  Appreciate them. It means your body is about to start gorging on your fat cells.  Nom, nom, nom.


I'm in no way the poster child for this subject, since I'm just getting started. I'm only passing along to you what I have learned in my hours and hours of reading about this topic.  I've shared with you what my limited experience has been, along with some links below featuring folks who have had great success.  If eating smaller meals is the easiest way for YOU to control your calorie intake and see the results that YOU want, then that's what YOU should do. It's worked for many.  But this fasting thing gives me a sense of control and keeps me from overeating during my typical binge-fest hours.  

IF feels like something I can live with long term.  Best of all, the evidence suggests that it's good for my health.  I'm sold.

One of my favorite IF blogs out there is 19 Hours = Freedom.  I like it because she takes a common sense approach and because she has had results.  If you're interested at all in IF, her blog is a good place to start.

Other IF links I like (there are tons more, but these are the ones I managed to save):

http://n8trainingsystems.com/2012/04/20/is-breakfast-the-most-important-meal-of-the-day/

http://www.marksdailyapple.com/fasting/#axzz1xhhqj5Ni

http://www.marksdailyapple.com/health-benefits-of-intermittent-fasting/#axzz1wCCJ8S2A

http://artofmanliness.com/2012/01/25/intermittent-fasting/

http://www.paleoplan.com/2012/05-09/intermittent-fasting-part-3-faq/





Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Orange Infused Roasted Green Beans

I confess.  I'm a dirty thief. I stole this from Jillian. I stole the photo, too, because I don't take pictures of food.  But this recipe is too tasty and too healthy not to steal and then pass along for the good of mankind.  Think of me as the Robin Hood of recipes, with Jillian being the rich and you being, well, the poor.

Once again, you're welcome.



Orange Infused Roasted Green Beans

1 lb. fresh green beans (Jillian says organic, but whatever)
1 red bell pepper, sliced thin
1 TB of extra virgin olive oil
Zest of one orange
1/2 tsp. salt
Crushed red pepper to taste (depends on how hot you like it)

Note: If you like your green beans tender and less on the crunchy side, try steaming them for a bit before you start.

Preheat oven to 450.  Toss together all ingredients and lay them out on on a baking sheet.  Roast for 15-20 minutes, turning once.  Grab your oven mitts.  Remove your masterpiece from the oven.  Eat it.  Sharing is optional.


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