Funny how even the grandest and worthiest of intentions can get flung to the wayside. But then again, when it comes to getting healthy and losing weight, this is the story of my life. Get sick and tired of feeling sick and tired, feel motivated and determined to make big changes, tell the world "This is IT!," go hard core for a week or two, see no results because my body fights me at every turn, get mad and discouraged and frustrated and throw my chubby hands up in the air and eat an entire pizza. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Warning: If you don't find whining and sniveling attractive, today's blog post may not be up your alley. Consider yourself warned.
Resume whining and sniveling in 3, 2, 1 ...
My most recent onset of the "This is it!" disorder struck me a few weeks ago when I heard of a local gym that was sponsoring a Biggest Loser competition, complete with a trainer, a team, team workouts, team challenges, weigh-ins, and full access to the gym for the full 12 weeks of the competition. The most appealing aspect of this competition to me? ACCOUNTABILITY. Knowing that I have a team counting on me and that my numbers will be posted for everyone to see are key. WAY key. So, I handed over the $250 last Monday night, stepped on the scale (GAH!), and began a week of hard workouts and perfect eating. Knowing how hard and how often I'd worked out this week and how many times I'd watched my family eat the "good" food while I ate the spinach greens and chicken breast or egg whites, I was SOOOO excited to get on that scale this morning for that second weigh-in, the one that was going to blow them away because it was so awesomely awesome. I braced myself for the look of shock on the skinny gym receptionist chick's face when she saw how much weight I'd lost. I was ready to feel that sense of accomplishment and victory, not to mention putting everyone else to shame with my jaw-dropping results.
And the results: 0. ZERO pounds lost. Not even one or two. Just zero. Followed by me grabbing my complimentary Biggest Loser gym bag and my shoes and rushing out to my car before anyone could see me burst into tears.
Why? Why am I doing this? Why am I writing down every last morsel that I eat, obsessing over every bite of food that goes into my mouth, balancing proteins and good carbs and fruits and veggies and fats, staying away from chips and crackers and cookies and white flour, working out until my face is purple and I'm drowning in my own sweat, only to have my heart shattered into a million tiny pieces by an inanimate object that shows me numbers that don't even BEGIN to match up to the amount of work and consistency I have put in over the last seven days? HOW in the world does a person stay motivated to keep at it, to never give up, when the results don't come? Those first weeks are supposed to be the weeks when the weight falls off at the highest rate. If week one looks like this for me, where do I go from here? It only gets harder with the results coming less easily. I've watched enough episodes of the real Biggest Loser to know that.
This has been my world for the past few years. So much frustration. So much work. So much disappointment and giving up and starting over. And now, just when I thought all this disappointment and frustration couldn't be any more fun, I have teammates whom I get to let down as well.
Help? Anyone? Fat is kicking my butt and leaving me crying like a girl in a wrung out heap on the floor.
The first week or two are not always awesome. Are you taking measurements? The first two weeks of P90X Jen gained 5 pounds, then she ended up losing 30 pounds overall by the end (35 counting the 5 she gained early on). Good eating and exercise WILL win eventually. It will not be fast and it will not be easy but it WILL win. Also, make sure you're getting enough calories for how hard you're working out. I hope this helps.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Biggs. Any words of advice/encouragement are helpful. I guess it does sound rather foolish and immature when I read it over again ... giving up after just one week because I'm not getting what I want--much like a toddler throws a tantrum when you take away his favorite toy. But in the past, when I lost a whopping 60 pounds, the scale was consistent for me. I would weigh myself every day. Every day that I was eating right and exercising (not NEARLY as hard or as much as I do now), the scale would show it. It would go down a little bit. Maybe, with getting older and putting my hormones out of whack by having four kids, I can't expect things to work like they used to. Not giving up, just feeling very discouraged after working so very hard this week. I'm part of a team and in a competition now, so these results--or lack thereof--don't just affect me for the next twelve weeks. :(
ReplyDeleteWelcome back! I don't have any inspiring or comforting words for you, I just wanted you to know that I'm proud of you for trying over and over. After this baby comes I'm going to be right back in the same boat with you, so don't give up. I'm going to need all the help I can get. Oh, and you can keep trying for yourself too. ;)
ReplyDelete((((((HUGS)))))) From a skinny minny with ZERO experience on the road you travel.....giving you love and encouragement, as well as a little advice....LOVE YOUR TUMMY!! Every morning look in the mirror and rub your tummy lovingly and say, "I love my tummy!" Tell your brain to work FOR you and not against you. Kick your RAS (reticular activating system) Check out Kirk Duncan's courses at www.3keyelements.com there are some free introductory classes in UT. CHANGE YOUR MINDSET...figure out what your subconscious blocks are. GO DEEP INSIDE and see what all that weight is PROTECTING!!!! It's emotional and spiritual, NOT just physical, unless you know of a physical disorder you have, yet even THAT is still tied to emotions. I went to Master of Influence training 2 weeks ago and am coming back this week for Present Yourself training. I'm hoping to get to UT AGAIN the third week in October for the Art of Mentoring training :) Your focus on the physical is NOT enough....go deeper honey!!! GO DEEPER ;-) Kirk Duncan and his wife lost TONS of weight in the last two years...they dug DEEP and kicked their RAS!!!! <3 ya tons!!!!
ReplyDeleteYou already know that muscle weighs more than fat, but I still want to hug you for your disappointment. The numbers aren't everything, and it's not fair that the competition is all about the numbers on the scale. For the sake of your grandchildren, don't give up!
ReplyDeleteJacey, NEVER give up! I know this is SO HARD!! The biggest difference for me was hiring a nutritionist to tell me exactly what to eat down to the gram. It was seriously the magic key that opened the door to my weight loss. Everything is catered to your body specifically and if followed exactly to what she tells you to eat, you WILL see results. It does cost $$$$ but it is SO worth the investment in yourself. I tried for so long on my own to get it all figured out and realized that I was possibly eating too much of the good food too. Let me know if you ever want more information about it. I think this biggest loser competition that you've joined sounds like a fun thing. You CAN do it! I KNOW it!
ReplyDeleteI know that it is so so hard to continue the struggle when you see no results. That is what lead me to intermittent fasting. Exercise is a great addition to anyone's life. It is fantastic for health and fitness and longevity. But, when you have a lot of weight to lose, it is not the answer.
ReplyDeleteThe reason for that is, exercise is hard. Hard in general but even harder with a 50 or 100 pound pack on your back. It is really hard work. Especially the amount of exercise that is needed to drop 50 or 100 pounds.
I have seen the workouts that the people on the biggest loser do and they work so hard that they actually puke.
If I worked that hard at something and then got on the scale and saw no reward for that effort, I would give up too. Anyone would. That is why there is an obesity crisis. No one can work out enough to lose that much weight. You realize that working out hard for an hour only burns 400 calories? And a piece of banana bread is 650 calories...and that is a snack.
Exercise is a great vice for health and stress management and as a way to assist in weight loss but it is not the answer to dropping large amounts of weight.
Food is the key. I lost 50 pounds with ZERO exercise. It was all about the food for me.
Exercise in a way that makes you feel good but don't beat yourself up to see scale results because it will never feel like it was worth it.
Come back to the fasting side of life! I know you will be successful if you just find what combination works for you.
Good luck Jacey! I am rooting for you!